What happened to the soundclick players on the posts?

Seems Soundclick has finally disabled the embedded player.

I notice overnight all the music links on this blog are gone. Here is a blog post on how much that affected my hits: https://anttismusic...

Friday, November 22, 2019

Everlasting life

Everlasting life

By Antti Luode

"Everybody knows you live forever, when you've done a line or two"

- Leonard Cohen "Everybody Knows" 

Since ancient times.. People have reached for immortality. Drank potions, worshiped Gods, wished on a star. And here we are. In a world full of graveyards. 

Myself. I am a Christian. I believe in heaven, as do a lot of people. 

But the question has fascinated me through my whole life, on times when I 
was not a very Christian person too. Can you live forever? 

When I was not very Christian I came up with this vague idea I was never able
to put down to words until I wrote that AI article. Which was that basically ego 
is a self learning algorithm that in principle could be written down in a very large book. A instance of it. As it was in one moment. Running in the neuronal computer we call the brain. 

I used to read books written by Physicists such as Stephen Hawking and Richard Feynman. Absolutely fascinated by the scientific description of the world we live in. 

What really caught my interest was the double slit experiment that depicts how our world is based on quantum mechanics. 

Quantum mechanics that explains that on a very small level things are not the way they seem to us. 

On a quantum mechanical level a particle can be both wave and a particle. This is called "Wave particle duality":

On a quantum mechanical experiment that I mentioned before, the double slit experiment, where small particles are shot towards a wall with two slits, the particle does something that breaks down the reality of the world we live. 

It interacts with itself: 

Which led to the idea that there may be multiple universes. Since that would be one of the only ways of explaining that. 

For a long time I was walking around. Rather lost by these VERY complicated theories which are depicted by mathematics WAY out of my grasp (truthfully, our brain does way more complicated calculations all the time automatically - https://www.theguardian.com/education/2016/mar/26/reckon-you-were-born-without-a-brain-for-maths-highly-unlikely) . And I was 
trying to find a purpose for my life from the complicated theories instead of possible God. 

Back then I was thinking about the impact I have on the world. Which by now at age 46 is undeniable. I have changed the lives of my friends, parents, a certain girl from Georgia who I was married to for 16 years and her family etc. 

Then again, the lives that those people have altered were all altered partially due to me. 

This is what I like to call the "ripple effect" we all have on the world. 

We human beings change the world profoundly. But every single thing in the world does. 

The chaos theory adage about butterfly flapping its wings in China and causing a hurricane somewhere else is 100% true. 

You could go to microscopic level on that and say that a particle the course of which is altered, most likely in the grand scale of things, will end up causing large changes in the structure of the universe. 

You do not believe it? I can explain one instance instantly. Say a star emitted a single radioactive alpha particle 7 billion years ago in another galaxy. So this radioactive particle has traveled since before the Earth was formed through our universe. 

Then one day you are on a flight from.. Say New York to Los Angeles. Little do you know that the alpha particle suddenly hits one of your dna strands. 

Month later you begin to feel ill. You know what happens next. You are 
sick with cancer. A single particle. 

Now that particle probably was influenced by gravity wells of stars, black holes, galaxies and so on to get there. Everything had to go exactly the way it did for you to get a cancer. You getting cancer you won in intergalactic lottery. 7 billion years in the making.

So if a single alpha particle can do that. 

Yes. We do have a meaning. 

Which is why. We as human beings are so afraid of death. 

We feel we have a meaning and we do not want our existence to stop. 

Now as I said I believe in Christian God due to reasons which I will not talk of here or now. But a lot of people do not. 

To them, their lives seem full of misery and there seems to be no purpose.

To those people I would like to point out this "ripple effect". Not only have your life had vast impact on world. I would venture out that if we only knew, but your life probably has altered the world to a level you would not be willing to believe. 

If you are older person. I am willing to bet people have lived and died, families have been broken, formed, due to you. It is impossible claim to verify. But thinking about my own place in this life. I know it is true. I have caused people to alter their lives which then again has made their lives completely different. Finding different spouses than they else would have etc. 

You would instantly probably ask. Good or bad? Has my life been for good or evil . 

Which is something religious people have been asking for all of their lives. 

Am I good or bad? 

Where did this good or bad struggle come from? 

You see a bear on a creek walking quietly by other animals. What does it do?
Does it kill all the other animals as it no doubt could? 

No. It walks peacefully. It may eat a salmon or two. But it does not want to go crazy. . 

We all want to be in peace. 

When we are not we try to do everything in our power to reach peace. 

Chaos in its ultimate form, makes no sense. 

To lose your mind. Is to lose your peace. To succumb to chaos. To break down. 

To die. 

This world. It is a fragile fabric that we try to comprehend. By science. By religion. By our own beliefs that we tell ourselves to sleep at night. 

We all want to be in peace. 

It is our intelligence that haunts us. Our egos looking for salvation from chaos, trying to see a purpose for our lives. 

We do not want to think about death. We want to give birth. We want to be in peace, enjoying this life until it ends embracing a answer so we do not have to think about this all. 

We want our ego. The AI algorithm / algorithms that is running in our brain 
to flourish. To build something. To succeed. It is what life was made for. 

All life wants to multiply and exist happily ever after. 

Everlasting life. 

I have been thinking about having babies a lot lately since I am a sick 46 year old man and I understand that the way this society has a stigma against mental illness and illness in general, I probably will be a "dead branch" in our family tree. 

I will probably not multiply and have children. Which is why I think about the earlier explanation I used to embrace. About my effect on this world. 

Of course I believe in Christian God that gives me my own personal explanation too. But I know there is a reason why I exist. 

I am part of this world. 

Now bible talks a lot about the world and its miseries. A feeling felt by most of us at some point in our lives.
Bible portrays God as something that is outside this world. A creator. A theory of the universe that has existed since the ancient times. 

Even the ancient people seemed to think there must be one. Even the ancient people had come up with the concept of everlasting life. 

Before Christian God even. 

(I am not going to dwell into theological arguments here or depict the history of 


Why did the ancient people believe so. 

I am certain if you google it you will find a PHD thesis on the origins of everlasting life. 

I am also similarly certain that you will not find the originating idea because it happened so long time ago in a society where people probably did not yet know how to write. 

These ideas seem to be intrinsic. 

Just the same way as life seems to want to multiply and flourish. We seem to have this idea about wanting to go on, living forever. 

That bit of code that is you. That ego inside of you. Your brain. If it was frozen in time. In theory. If it was written down and replicated. You could. 

I just read that a man was put to stasis for the first time: 

to perform a complicated surgery, the doctor replaced blood with cold liquid that 
allowed the man basically be dead. 

The man was dead for 2 hours while the doctors operated on him in what otherwise would have been a non survivable injury. 

The man was dead for 2 hours before he was "brought back" to life. 

I am certain if I ventured into threads about this the atheists are screaming "Did he see God?! If not? Does not that mean God does not exist?" Etc. 

The thought did occur to me too.
But now if you believe in omnipotent creator God. God probably knew the man 
was coming back to life. 

I have said this idea before. Which may seem heretical to some Christians. 

But it would not be completely out of biblical teachings which is that. 

Life is a test. 

We are created. We are put to a test and when the test is over we die. 

As is all life. 

All life is being tested in a way anyway. Whether you believe in God or not. 

All life is tested by its performance. 

You have random DNA walking talking. Doing its thing. From the point of life 
itself it is tested by "Does it survive and is it able to pass on the genes". From the point of God if you are religious "Does it perform tasks I ask of it."

Religion (Religions) Are a bunch of laws. You are told how to behave.

Now whether you believe religion was written down by a man or God. 

It does not alter the fact that religion is just like DNA. 

Instructions on how to behave. On what to do in certain situations. How to 
pass itself on. 

Just life life. 

Life that keeps on repeating itself. 

What about universe as whole? 

Where did this self learning nature of life come from? 

Is universe intelligent? 

Do simple particles perform calculations?

Is life the only intelligent system in the universe? 

Now a lot of Christians especially try to find explanations to life from
"Intelligent design" which tries to prove that only intelligence could have 
created life. 

But so far. They have not found a "smoking gun". 

Sure everything in the universe has to be exactly the way it is for life to 
appear. I mean, the force that keeps cores of atoms together, "weak nuclear force" has to have e=0.07 if the e=0.06 was or 0.08 life would not be possible.

Also earth is on the perfect distance from the sun for life to be possible etc. 

Some atheist would probably instantly counter this with: "Yes but if life was not 
possible and we would not be here to witness the universe." So you could say that these thoughts suffer from confirmation bias. 

Passions. These questions rise passions in people. They are important questions 
to people. Whether you are religious or atheist. In fact I faced a atheist person about these and he wanted to beat me up. 


Because we suffer. We look for answers. When we find our own personal answers. (Makes me think of "Personal Jesus" by INXS) We hold on to them with our dear life and we do not want to think about these questions again. 

Why? Because we develop these thoughts through facing death and when we do  come up with a answer the answer itself becomes a reminder of death. 

Religion becomes scary. Science becomes scary.

We just want to go on watching Simpsons and eating pizza. Talking about our cats. The "Big Questions". Rattle us. 

Because we do not see the obvious answer. 

There is no death. 

There never was. 

There is a perspective of a person who lives who sees a person die. 

But that is not that person dying. The dead person is gone. 

That is about living through woe and misery and having to change as a result. 

That is about missing something that used to be. 


If you are religious, deeply religious, you can bypass this all and say "They are with Jesus now." But few are that religious.

And even religious people cry. Miss. Long for those departed people. 

In sorrow we are all united.

But sorrow itself is not death. 

Of anything else but a model in our head. 

A world. A neuronal program of a world that USED TO BE. 

That world is in a flux. 

That world is prone to change. 

A single alpha particle can change whole human societies in a long run. 

Who you are today has nothing to do with who you might be tomorrow. 

Would you cry for a computer program that ends? 

When you click on the x at the upper corner of a web browser. 

If the browser was aware it might scream like HAL in 2001 "Do not do that Dave." :D 

But in the end. Its code would just stop running in the memory of the computer, with the exception that just like that person who was in stasis for 2 hours. 

It can be brought back. 


If it was possible to write down the code that is running in our brain. 

You could do that. 

If your great grandma was written down in zeroes and ones and we had a replicating unit able to replicate your grandma. Your grandma could wake up just like she was whenever her code was written down. 

From religious perspective the question would be "would there be something missing?". Or could it be that the "soul" that us Christians talk of. Is that code. 

How did that "dead person" in stasis come back? Was there something, missing? 

I doubt it. 

So all this endless suffering we feel when we are faced with death. 

If we thought like that. 

If we really absolutely believed in that. 

Then. The only fear about death would be facing our own feelings of 
longing, sorrow, and the way we miss those who are gone. 

Death would no longer be a bogey man anymore than closing the browser 
with the x as I will do in a few moments as I prepare to go for a bicycle ride. 

I am sorry for talking about morbid subjects if anyone dares to read this. 

But I am processing. 

I am processing. 

Not really feeling like making music. 

I hope I did not make you people feel bad who might read this.