What happened to the soundclick players on the posts?

Seems Soundclick has finally disabled the embedded player.

I notice overnight all the music links on this blog are gone. Here is a blog post on how much that affected my hits: https://anttismusic...

Saturday, September 19, 2020

On The Nature Of Reality

By Antti Luode

I could watch a movie, or write this piece. I think I'll skip the movie. 


Because I was watching out of the window as I was warming up a cinnamon 

roll and watching out. Watching out, I thought about the nature of reality 

and it first struck me that there are different versions of reality. 

You could describe reality as the physical world we live in. This would 

be maybe how a physicist would define it. Or you could define it as the 

inner world we live in and of course since I have been thinking about my 

brain endessly, that is what I am going to go with. 

So what is "reality" in our inner world. Well, first of all it is a concept. 

A definition that animals could not understand. To Them reality just is. 

They are in reality and live in it according to their instincts mostly. 

To us it is a much more complicated issue. 

We can change reality at will by doing things like warming up a cup of 

coffee and eating a cinnamon roll. As can a animal in a way too. Doing 

those things gives us a shot of dopamine and sugar which changes the way 

we feel about the moment. 

But reality is very hard to pin when you define it this way. 

If reality is something we perceive with our brain. Then you have to 

take a look in. 

What part of the brain does the reality exist in? 

In all parts! 

If it appears in all parts then what if we change the reality by changing 

our perception or the inner functions of our brain by doing things like 

drinking a cup of coffee. 

Well, the reality does change. 

We change the reality by doings things that affect our brain. 

That is why you can watch a movie and forget about your problems, 

or you can write a piece about reality and have no clue where you are going 

but the process, the process can give you new insight. 

Is a little akin to a ant colony that is planted in a place where there 

are no ants. 

The ant colony follows certain rules according to which species you plant.  

But if you plant a species of Formica aquilonia, ant that builds large 

mound nests, it will probably start by sending recon ants around the place in

certain ways it has been programmed to do. By its genes. 

Then it will begin to change the place. It will bring certain things back 

to the pile, like a reactor of life it will infact begin to change the 

reality around the place it was planted in. 

Soon trails will appear around it where up to million plus ants will walk 

back and forth. Doing their tasks as they were programmed to do. 

We humans are no different in a way. 

I was planted in a business family 46 years ago and there were attempts to 

treat me like the other children, but I did not behave the way my brothers 

did. My reality was different from that of the others. 

My reality was different because of tiny differences in my brain. 

Which is true for all people. 

Our genes are slightly different and we can infact have mutations in our genes

which is what drives the evolution. Sadly yes, it can also kill us. 

But the reality we are locked in, is this inner reality that is defined 

by our genes. Mainly by the way our brain is.

Now, of course the reality is affected hugely by the enviroment we are in. 

Like if you plant the ants in a place where there is no food. Eventually 

the colony will starve and fade away. 

If you plant the colony in a place where it is surrounded by competition, 

it will have hard time fighting back. 

If you plant the colony in a place where food is plentiful and there is no 

competition, it may flourish greatly.. 

Not that much unlike the parable of seeds Jesus spoke of in the bible. 

But there are other factors, like weather at the place where the colony 

is and so on. 

Last of which is of course randomness of it all, which applies to us too. 

Reality for us is mostly about a story. 

A story come to life. 

We remember our past because we have words and the words define us. 

Without words, we would be hard pressed to define what happened a year ago. 

With words, not only can we describe what happened year ago, but what happened

decades ago or more, because in school the memories of past are trasferred 

to our brains from people dead long ago. 

The reality is a interconnected fabric of our environment, of our memories, 

this moment, instincts and the inner structure of our brain. 

So when our brain decays, our reality decays. You find out that what 

"was real". Never was. If you define yourself by, lets say your love for 

someone. It can be broken, by your citizenship. Another country can take 

over and change that. By your instincts. Certain diseases and medications 

can change that. 

The only thing that remains then of reality is the present moment and how 

it relates to the inner workings of your brain. 

In my case that includes the damaged neurons that are acting the way 

they are not supposed to. 

Lets look at the brain. I am not going to mention what I am facing, but 

lets say that you take half of your brain out. What happens to the reality that 

used to be in those neurons. The truth is that when you wake up, 

the reality is utterly different. What was stored in those neurons is gone, 

functions and algorithms that you had built your whole life time are wiped 

away. But is reality wiped away?

No, if you wake up. There is still some reality left. Which is funny 

in a way, because what happens if you cut more and more and more? At which 

point does your perceived reality end? 

Until you no longer have consciousness? 

Could reality be defined by consciousness. If it is consciousness, then 

what is consciousness? I wrote a long piece which I removed from the blog 

which was about my idea that consciousness is the "story of I". 

I was thinking that you could make something like a consciousness by having 

a "freewheeling" AI that would constantly try to define everything according 

to I. So a AI that would be live all the time would look at everything 

as it is according to its ego. 

Memories, present moment, instincts and so on. 

In a way that is true for humans and if I was discussing this with 

neuropsychologist, I could no doubt talk about it until I would stress myself

enough to have a seizure. 

But yes. Do we define reality by consciousness and what happens when 

you take parts of the machine that generates it away? 

Or is consciousness a illusion of sorts, borne out of the inner workings 

of the brain. 

I mean, I feel real right now writing this. But most of this text is 

reurgiated drivel coming from neurons from a subject that I have been 

thinking about a lot these past few years as I have been facing death. 

Are these words somehow deeply different from a text Generated by GPT 3 

for instance? 

What is this reality that I am so bound to? 

Every night when we go to sleep. We lose reality in a way, for a moment 

there is just the different stages of sleep, at some of which we do not 

really exist in a way, if you define reality being consciousness. 

So do we die at night? When we wake up to a new day, have we died and 

was yesterday just a illusion. Or if you have a abscense seizure, is 

your reality interrupted? 

Of course those who live define people in their reality as somebodies 

who they can get in touch with and they will be as they knew them. 

In my case that changed while I was alive. My disease changed me, so 

people no longer wanted to be in contact with me, because I changed. 

Mostly I think reality is about our senses. What you look at, you become. 

Matthew 6:22

"The light of the body is the eye: if. therefore thine eye be single,

 thy. whole body shall be full of light."

I have been thinking about this a lot. I sadly have been drawn to follow

the US elections and in a way I am realizing, that the media is driving 

people like me insane. 

If you keep on reading the news, you feel like the end is coming. They

seem to make everything apocalyptic. 

What you read, you become. 

In a divisive issues, you choose a side, once you do. Your mind begins 

to develop a bias, once you have a bias. You just do not have to think 

anymore. Your words come out of your mouth and fingers the way I am writing 

this now. Generated by some part of my brain without any real effort. 

But there is a method to the madness. 

When you read news for example. You are transferring the words to your 

long term memory and once there, your cognition begins to reflect everything 

in light of these memories. If your bias is to the left or right in the 

politics for example you use these memories to define your reality. 

Your reality becomes your political position. 

But in the end, the reality is much more complicated. 

But we have this natural tendency to see things in simple right or wrong, 

left or right, good or bad and so on. 

And in extreme case, we can stand behind our description of reality 

all the way up to dying on a battlefield. 

But reality just is. 

What you could observe instead is two sides that are divided on issues 

and both sides are trying to win. You could observe the biases of the two 

sides and try to reason what are their motivations for what they say and 

then try to look at them as such. With no judgement. 

But it is hard to rise above issues. To not be swept away. 

The biggest thing we have tremendous judgment about, is the issue 

of our reality being turned off. Ie, death. 

Our whole mind has evolved to fight that. 

We are not supposed to die. 

Meanwhile snails for example, after heavy rain, come out to the pavement 

and cars crack their shells with no judgement. You can not possibly 

avoid driving over snails on a pavement after rain. So they die in droves. 

Mass murder. 

That could be seen as such. Some sensitive person could cry over these 


Then if you are so sensitive. What about your own / death of other people. 

Absolute incomparable madness. 

But we face it. 

Reality just is such. 

But death is a concept. 

No one has died and observed it. 

We see it from outside if we see someone die, but the person dying, 

does not observe the moment after death. 

The snail is not there to witness its cracked shell. 

Reality. What a elusive bastard. 


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